You can't have it all...every day.

I keep reading articles, blog posts, Facebook rants & other nonsense that repeats this point ad nauseam: Ladies, when you become a mom, you can't have it all.

Bullsh*t.

I can have whatever I damn well please, thankyouverymuch.

If I choose to have more kids, a demanding/rewarding/exhausting career and a reading list that would take the better part of a decade to tackle, then I will find a way to have all frickin' three.

I work for an amazing company (and dear God, please don't let them ever find this blog!), in a role that challenges me, makes me dance for joy & cry in frustration, sometimes all in the same hour. I have two amazing kids, who love to waller me every time I sit down, sing me songs with the most hilariously convoluted lyrics and, in my daughter's case, change her mind 70 times about every.single.decision. Plus TheYankee, who tolerates me & frustrates me, in varying measures.

My personal life & professional life fall somewhere between mind-numbing exhaustion and indescribable joy and where they fall in that range can change from minute to minute. I love my kids for showing me a love I didn't know possible, for helping me be more present in the little moments & teaching me to enjoy all the joy life holds. I love my career for helping me craft my adult identity, introducing wonderfully irreverent people into my daily routine & for giving me an awesome paycheck.

I love them both & I'm not sorry for it. Though, truth be told, I don't feel loving thoughts every minute...some days I resent getting out of my warm bed when a 30+lb bed bug is calling "Snuggle me, Mommy!" and other days I grumble at the monotony of coming home to the evening routine when offers of drinks & blowing off steam with coworkers sounds like the perfect prescription.

And, maybe, you're thinking that I just proven the very point of "moms can't have it all", but I disagree. I would bet that single guys sometimes resent their jobs for keeping them from the golf course/garage/gym or models occasionally resent the rest of womankind that can eat three slices of cheesecake & not have to worry about a lost job. Everybody can have all the things that you want, though it may not be in the exact timing or balance that you want.

Some days I wish it was a weekend on a weekday or visa-versa. Some days I want to channel my daughter and throw a fit because I didn't get what I wanted at that very second, but when I take a deep breath, put on my big girl panties & evaluate my life, I realize: I have it all.

(Except Chris Hemsworth. Come on internets, don't fail me on this one!)

And with that, I've decided what I will not to have? Bitter people telling me what my life cannot be. I'm too busy having it all & enjoying it all to listen to that sh*t.

Like I never even missed a beat...

...I won't be getting a side gig as a drummer anytime soon. 

Yes, I'm still alive. Yes, my kids & TheYankee are alive too. The ShittyInLaws weren't so lucky. (I'm kidding.)

Yes, I'm still crunchy to the core. Actually more so now, thanks to clean eating. Don't worry, I didn't do anything crazy, like give up whiskey. I just stopped drinking mixers. (Not even kidding.) Am I a walking oxymoron or what?

I changed jobs (Halle-freakin-lujah!) & now have more time for the kids to waller me on a daily basis. I love it, minus the (not) infrequent elbows to the breasts. (If I see that somebody found this belong through the latter portion of that last sentence I will probably wet myself from laughing.) 

Other than that, it is pretty much the same old smart*ss routine around here. What have ya'll been up to? Besides missing me, of course.